I Hope You've Learned Your Lesson, Missy!

So the sunburn peeled over the weekend. No, I will not post a lurid description of that process. Freaks.

I am left with tender new skin, itchy and ultrasensitive. Better than feeling like a Komodo Dragon, though. No peeling pics -- sorry -- but here's a pic from B-day, last Sunday.




If you look closely, you can see the strip of bright red between my Tigger pajama pants and my strappy top. Basically, I had this fire engine red deal going on with my shoulders, a blinding white back and ass, and this attractive crimson stripe, painted right across the lower back.

My son found the stripe particularly amusing. Hilarious, in fact. The boy actually had tears coming out of his eyes. I'm pretty sure I even recognized the "What the hell is up with white people frying themselves like that?!" look in his eye.

Whatever. It wasn't that funny.

Now why couldn't I listen to my own damn self? How many times have I told Teen Demon about the evils that could befall her while wearing a Too Short Shirt? Especially when paired with Low Rider pants! Anything could happen, walking around with Bare Midriff! There's a reason it's against the school dress code, Missy.

No wonder she smirked beyond what I thought appropriate. Brat.

I have not bared my midriff since setting foot back in the States. Well, okay, maybe that first summer, but not since then. No friggin' way. For one thing, my midriff is more like the dreaded muffin top these days. Second, it's too damn cold here. Tank tops? Are you freaking kidding me? Only as an undershirt. Which I always have on, even in summer. And the closest I've come to shorts in three years are cargo capris.

Cargo capris are found at any Old Navy store. They are casual, loose fitting, and sport an abundance of pockets. More often than not, they are also low riders. Last Sunday, what with the freakish heat wave and all (sarcasm, Puget Sound readers), I donned my cargo capris and a strappy top. (These things were actually stored away under my bed. That's how often I wear capris. I had to shave my damn legs, too.)

I was feeling exposed and out of my comfort zone, what with no undershirt on last Sunday, arms and a bit of lower back open to the elements, but what the hell! It was hot! I was happy! Actually I was manic, truth be told. So, out I went to mow the lawn in my cute little summer ensemble.
You know the rest of the story.