15 December 2007

Morning Bells Are Clanging


Have I mentioned how I hate mornings? Did I make clear how weekends are prized above all else for the luxury of sleeping in?

Again with the world being run by Morning Morons. This is the second weekend in a row that Male Offspring has had to be at the school at an ungodly hour, complete with (huge) nutritious lunch and showering accoutrements. Last weekend, 05:45. Yes, that's in the morning. I'm surprised I didn't hear the cheery notes of Reveille as we headed out the door. Today, was a "late bus" -- 06:45.

On Saturday.


Teen Demon cheers at the Varsity tournament,and drives her own self to school, but the bus for that leaves at a different time than the JV bus. Of course it does. What the hell kind of scheduling is that? Who runs these things? Oh, right, that would be the morning people. Those bright-eyed bushy-tailed evil minions of Satan's asshole.

I could just make Male Offspring get up 45 minutes earlier to go in with his sister and wait in the dark at the school for his team, but come on people, I'm not that sorry. The boy was up 'til 11 last night doing his homework, and will be busting his ass all day on the mats, and doing homework for a good part of tomorrow. This is what I signed up for. Except that when I signed up for it, I was -- hello -- married to morning person, who would've been up anyway.


Last weekend I dropped the son off according to Satan's timetable, drove back home, glared at the dogs, who thought it was time to go for a walk (ain't happening, boys, do I look like Mary friggin' Sunshine to you?), got back in bed and slept for 3 more hours. Then I drove out to BFE where the tourney was.

I don't know where the hell I'm going today, so I thought I'd just print out driving directions real quick before crawling back up to my lair. Thing is, my body, traitor that it is, now feels it could actually just stay up. Yeah well, the brain's in control here, Body. You haven't exactly been looking out for me the last couple of years anydamnway. My ass and the rest of me is burrowing right back under those comforters. They're probably still warm.

See you all at a decent hour.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I've been to BFE. Lovely place. Dream about happy things. (:

sageweb said...

Okay I am a long time reader first time commenting! I am a "bright-eyed bushy-tailed evil minion of Satan's asshole"....This Morning, my eyes opened at 5:30 a.m. no alarm. I wish one day I could sleep in, but my body won't allow it. I am finally commenting because of the whole satan's asshole..made me laugh and spit out whatever it was I was chewing on. I have a few ex's that would love that description of me. I would pass it on to them...but I am sure they are still asleep.

Boy About Town said...

when in doubt stay in bed! the dogs can walk themselves, the offspring can do the same! what you need is "me time"! I have it every second of every day! its lonely at times but when it gets to bad I just take The Dog for her weekly walk!

more cowbell said...

BFHat: Headed to Marysville in a bit ... tempted to keep right on headed north to Hatsville.

Sageweb: Haha! Welcome! If you like late night rambling and early morning bitching, this is the place. I'm certainly glad you found the satan's asshole deal amusing rather than offensive, being the morning person that you are. (Actually, credit where credit is due: I shamelessly stole the "Satan's asshole" expletive from my very creative and irreverent eldest daughter. It was just too good not to.) My Ex used to say the same thing about wishing he could sleep in. It was a real bitch for him when we were shift workers. Me, I can sleep whenever.

Boy About Town: (question to self: is it appropriate to call him BAT for short?) Welcome as well - it's a twofer today. I saw at your site that you are also a believer in going back to bed until a "less respectable hour". I like it. (but you also scared me with that whole "baking for relaxation" thing.)

Java said...

BFE? Clue me in.
Baking for relaxation? I'll have to check the boy out.
Re: mornings- I drive a school bus. My route is at the bottom of the county. It takes 25 minutes to get to my first stop. I have more bus stops before I come back into town. The elementary kids need to be at school as close to 7:15 as possible. You working on the math? 4:15 a.m. is when the alarm goes off. This gives me time to have some coffee and either look at the newspaper or see who else posts this friggin' early. Sticky Crows posts early, btw. If it is 6 a.m. when I drive the bus off the lot, I'm late. But this morning I slept until almost 10! It was wonderful.

Kimberly Ann said...

I hope you brought back some of those great BFE souvenirs that all the kids want ("My mom went to BFE and all I got was this lousy t-shirt" etc etc etc).

Red Seven said...

Totally sucks.

Weirdly, I was up really early on Saturday as well. Normally, I would have rolled over and gone back to sleep, but since the first thing on Saturday's schedule was to drive to the beach to visit the adoptive lesbian moms for a weekend of parties and such, I decided to just get up and go -- and it was fun. Sort of. Well, not really, but it was nice to get to the beach before 10:30 am.

more cowbell said...

Java: That job would make me insane. Not only are you up at an ungodly hour, but you're soon surrounded by high little voices, giggles and shrieks. Kids are fine, but not that early in large numbers.

Also, you have caused me to think about my usage of BFE, which in my mind was "Bee Eff Eee", meaning someplace out in the sticks in the middle of nowhere. The actual acronym stands for Beyond Fucking Egypt, or the more vulgar Bum-fuck(ed) Egypt. Actually stopping to think about that phrase, I'm thinking it's really not a nice phrase at all. What the hell does that second one mean anyway? It doesn't even make sense, and just sounds rude. So, to answer your question, that's the sordid meaning, as far as I know, but I think I need to just purge that from my vocabulary. I wonder how many other things I say without even thinking about it?

KA: Well, I guess I'll get rid of the T-shirts too. Damn.

Red: Getting up early to go to the beach for the weekend is entirely acceptable and encouraged. Hope you had fun!